Written by Ashley Lopez

I’m a twenty-seven-year-old woman who floats through life constantly questioning and recognizing my actions, feelings, and reactions. I don’t remember at what age I because so in-tune with my feelings, or when I began to realize that I notice them so much, but I truly think it’s one of my best qualities.

Hi everyone, welcome back to Ashley Spills. Ashley, here. You can check out my other posts here.

What does self-awareness mean to you? If you look it up, you’ll find “an awareness of one’s own personality or individuality” in the Merriam-Webster dictionary. Do you agree with this definition?

How self-aware are you?

I think the definition is pretty accurate, though, I’d like to add context to it. Sure, being self-aware means that you’re aware of your personality, but what about it? What triggers cause your responses and actions? For example, say you’re pissed off because you have to be on hold for over twenty minutes and you’re so upset that it’s ruining your day. Let’s throw in that your 100% sure you’re ONLY mad because you have to be on hold on the phone.

Okay, great. But why did that specific thing make you mad enough to ruin your day? Can you go back and reflect on a time when that happened? Are you mad because you don’t like coming in second? Or maybe you’re mad because you’re impatient? Why are you so impatient?

We could all fall into our own personal rabbit hole.

See, the thing about self-awareness is that as much as you’d like to think you know yourself, you can always dig deeper. It’s okay to be a little self-centered and want to know more about yourself, I applaud you for wanting to.

Today I thought I’d share some reflective questions to help you face and answer things you may not be ready to, or even want to. Or maybe you haven’t even thought about becoming more self-aware until you stumbled upon this blog (which, I mean, c’mon it’s a pretty awesome blog).

Questions for self-awareness

1. What are three things that make you feel scared? Can you think of the first time those things scared you? Where were you? What was the outcome? Who were you with? How did they happen?
2. If you can go back in time and change something about your life, what would it be? Why are you so set on changing it? How do you think your life would have turned out if you changed it? Would you lose a valuable lesson?
3. Go back to your adolescence: What is your best memory? Why? What were you doing that you enjoyed enough to remember to this day as an adult? Can you relive that memory now? If so, will you try to do so?
4. If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would it be? Why there? Why is it so special? What attracts you to that place the most? What attributes from that place can you try to incorporate or bring to where you are now?
5. Are you scared of things changing? If yes, why does change scare you so much? Do you think the change will negatively impact you? If no, are you craving change? Can you make a change right now if you wanted to?

Reflections and self-awareness

If you’ve read my blog before you know that I drill self-reflections. I said this one too many times, but I’ll say it again: The only way to understand yourself is by doing self-reflections. Expressing yourself through these exercises can help you pinpoint so many things about yourself. You can reflect by asking yourself self-reflection questions. (You can check out this post for some example questions.)

Remember, if there’s a chance to dig deeper, do it! The more personal you get with yourself, the better. You are the only one listening to your thoughts and voice and you are the only one reading or seeing your form of expression. It’s okay to not share everything, keep the mystery alive.

As much as I’ve learned about myself, I still have a long way to go. One day I think I know it all, but I don’t. I’ll never know it all, but trying to know all about me has helped me make some important career, relationship, and life decisions.

You don’t know what you don’t know.

Thanks for reading, xo.