Written by Ashley Lopez

Ahhhh, April was a fun one. Let’s see. Oh, got it—falling off my skates, hurting both knees, and chipping my tooth. That’s old news now though.

Hi everyone, welcome back to Ashley Spills. Ashley, here. You can check out my other posts here.

What was the most memorable part of this past month?

What I really want to reflect on is something my best friend told me about my multiple jobs. I got a new job and I’m a little stressed about it… already. I counted on my fingers how many jobs I’ve had and we talked about. This is what she said:

“I do think you having this many jobs isn’t the best. On one side yes we’re at an age where we’re figuring things out and you may not know what you’ll like until you’re there, but I feel like before taking another job you need to think more critically on whether it’ll be a good fit from all angles. Everything is going to have its downsides, you just have to deal with but it seems like you find the downsides and run with them until you’re miserable.”

Kudos to my real ones always calling me out on my bullsh*t. When I received this text message, the last sentence stung. Let’s just say I re-read it a bunch of times. Okay. So, she’s right. Now what?

Is having different jobs bad?

How am I so positive about other facets in my life, but not about work. Maybe I’m lazy, hate working, hard to please, or I’m all of the above. Who knows? The point is, a massive flaw was pointed out to me that I was avoiding. Now I need to fix it. I’ve only had this job for two weeks and although I’ve had some good days, I’ve also had bad days. See the thing is, they aren’t necessarily “bad.” I just get in my moods and make them bad for no reason.

When something annoys me, I nitpick at it until I have nothing to complain about because I’ve already done all the complaining there is to do. Nothing in life is perfect and instead of focusing on the negative of a situation, I should highlight the positive and keep this cycle going until it sinks in and there isn’t as much “bad” to spread.

My mind is constantly playing tricks on me and blinding me with the undesirable of situations. I’m always worried and stressed about things that shouldn’t stress me out at all. Since working is such a big part of our lives, it’s hard for me to succumb to the role of it since I spend half of my time at work. I assume I need to be walking on rainbows while I’m doing it.

Maybe having different jobs isn’t all bad

But, hey that’s why I’m young and still figuring out what I like or don’t like or that the reality of work isn’t galloping through sunshine… but shouldn’t it? Until I reach the sunshine, I will keep focusing on the good that all situations have to offer; I may just have to do a bit of digging every now and then.

In the end, the first two weeks of April were bad because of my knees and the last two weren’t bad, but I did what I could to make them seem bad. And now, April is gone with not much to show for it besides my own pessimism.

I am challenging myself to look on the bright side of any situation that may or may not be good or too exciting. I believe this will help me flourish in all aspects of life. What do you think? What is your biggest goal in May?

Thanks for reading, xo.

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